During the next two month Thom and I are renting a home in the mountains high above our desert valley home. We have been fortunate to do that for a month or more for over 20+ years. How? The best explanation is because we rightsized our lives. As some of you know, rightsizing is the conscious choice to design a life that focuses on what really matters to you and then work to eliminate the rest. So instead of merely downsizing (often seen as a sacrifice) rightsizing is moving toward what is more fulfilling and beneficial. Naturally people are different and we all face different circumstances, but when we take the time to be conscious about what really matters to us and our families, and then follow those directives, we can call our lives rightsized. This week while taking a walk in nature, Thom and I began talking about how rightsizing really is more important now than ever before. The more uncertainty with our health, our economy or even our social structures, the more important it is to clarify our individual requirements. None of us can control all of the circumstances in our lives, but we can work to create a life that fits our needs and current times in any given period. If you would like a bit more information about how we’ve done it, and hopefully get some ideas about how it could work for you, please visit the linked vlog. Afterwards, we would love to hear your thoughts, comments or even how you’ve managed to rightsize your life in these times.
I appreciate the differentiation between downsizing and right, or appropriate to you, your values, stage in life, current needs, what brings ease and peace and spaciousness —sizing.
“Down” is reminiscent to me of “Minimalism”, and the tone feels unjuicy to me.
We are leaving California and moving back to the Midwest, Chicago. We will be choosing a home that serves our needs and spending time with our son and his wife. It’s a big change for us, but we will be living in the community in which we were raised, met and married. So far we don’t have a house–still looking. So onward with hope, Beth
Hi Beth! So sorry you will no longer be a California “neighbor” but understand different motivations. I hope you take the time to find the PERFECT rightsized place for yourself and that it all unfolds well for you. ~Kathy
I had to downsize into a small room in someone’s house for the time being with my two dogs. It’s too downsized for me but after losing a partner was necessary. Luckily, it will only be temporary. I’d love to get brave and make a move to Portugal, Spain, or Mexico when things get back to normal. Hopefully, I won’t be too old by then. I’d like to have some fun like that especially since I got rid of most of my possessions.
Hi Rebecca! I can imagine that going from a regular house/apartment to just a room would be difficult…especially with two dogs! The benefit is that you will be able to be judge what size you do need going forward (once you can do that!) The good news is that you’ve gotten rid of most of your possessions so you won’t have to do that! And yes to trying Portugal, Spain or Mexico. All places I love too. Of course it’s a bit tricky with dogs but I know some people do manage it. Hopefully for all us hungry for travel we will be able to do it safely sometime soon. ~Kathy
I have a mountain cabin where I spend every other weekend, so I understand the appeal of a mountain getaway. More importantly, I understand your message of rightsizing and living in harmony and alignment with our actual needs.
Hi Galen! Isn’t it wonderful to have a place to “escape to” in these times? Any of us who can swing it one way or another are very fortunate, indeed. Finding that balance is something I hope for everyone. Thanks for your comment! ~Kathy
Kathy, I really appreciate the message you have shared here. Malcolm and I have always lived below our means and because of choices we made when we were younger, we were able to retire at age 50, debt free. We live in a big home that we complain about a lot in terms of upkeep and excess space and will eventually sell, but it feels pretty perfect right now. Being able to have our daughter and her boyfriend live with us and work from here has been a godsend. This situation has given me pause to evaluate what might be ‘right’ for us, in terms of housing, in the future.
I think that at the core of Right-Sizing is happiness and contentment. Having a partner who mirrors your commitment and flexibility is essential to the process and it seems as though both you and I have found our reflection.
Your getaway to the mountains is very appealing to me right now. A little change of scenery would do the spirit good.
Hi Suzanne! Thom and I have talked about how the pandemic is effecting decisions about “downsizing”. As you point out, rightsizing might mean that you keep a bigger house because you have family living there with you–and let’s face it, it can be nice to have a little extra space when you can’t go anywhere else. That’s why rightsizing is so individual! And YES! I completely agree that rightsizing emphasizes happiness and contentment in whatever circumstances you find yourself. And I COMPLETELY AGREE that having a partner that mirrors your values is a huge benefit. And even if you can’t get away for any length of time…a daytime road trip can sometimes be just what you need. ~Kathy
You two are as passionate about rightsizing when you talk than I am when talking about travel, the nomadic lifestyle, and wildlife encounters. 🙂
As you know, for some reason, I’ve “rightsized” my entire life, choosing freedom and travel above material goods and monetary wealth. And, yes, I am happy to have prioritized that from the moment I graduated college in Belgium (where education doesn’t involve student loans or debt). I could write a book about starting all this in my twenties, one day. Haha.
Currently, I’m rightsizing in an RV, funny enough. Except, in our situation, our camper van, sailboat, or anything else we roamed about in over the last 17 years is always our home at the same time. And, we usually research and plan enough to be able to sell those means of travel for around the same price as we bought them, cash.
Enjoy your stay in the mountains and the woods and have a great weekend!
Hi Liesbet! As I’ve told you before, I LOVE how you and Mark have rightsized your life. It is such an excellent example of how unique the process can be as well as how it fits us all so differently. As much as I admire your lifestyle, I can’t imagine me doing it–and I’m sure you feel the same about mine. You certainly should/could right a book about how it has unfolded in your life. Make that your Memoir #2? For any one of my readers who wants to read about an entirely different way to rightsize, I recommend your blog: roamingabout.com Enjoy your travels this summer! ~Kathy
Thanks for the shout-out, Kathy. It certainly is a very unique way of rightsizing with us. And it came organically. I couldn’t explain it if I wanted to. 🙂
I enjoyed hearing your voices.What a great way to blog, or vlog, as others are calling it! I think I must have unconsciously rightsized, without actually setting out to do it. I have pared everything down over the years, ending up with more time than I ever thought possible. I rarely add anything to my schedule or my material possessions without giving it careful thought. That’s a necessary process as we age and realize that time and energy are just to precious to waste!
Hi Diane! I’m glad you enjoyed hearing our voices as well as our thoughts. It is sort of an experiment because I’m guessing that most of my “readers” aren’t as familiar with Vlogs as perhaps others. But it is a chance to try something new AND reach a new audience for our blog so we want to give it a try. And now that we have the formula down and the technology that makes it rather easy, it is a fun way to communicate.
I also agree that many of us we get older have learned that our time, our energy and our resources are important things to manage. As you say, time and energy become more and more precious and none of should want to waste that! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy and Thom! I really enjoyed this vlog (I enjoy them all, but this one especially)…. such great advice. I think you saved the best for last when you talked about choosing your friends carefully. If you hang out with people who either have a lot more money than you do, or, probably more common, do not spend their money wisely, it can be easy to get caught up on the consumption treadmill.
Your mountain setting looks lovely! I can see why you’ve chosen to spend part of your summers there. Let us know when to start packing our bags 🙂
Hi Janis! Thank you! I know in most cases we are “preaching to the choir” but rightsizing does help remind us over and over what is important to us. And I count you and Paul as people who are also rightsized as well–so it’s no wonder that we consider friends. Looking forward to when you can come up for a “socially distant” visit! ~Kathy
Great vlog and recording. (We know how you did it Thom.) We love Rightsizing and especially the reduced stress and peace of mind. No, we are not buying an RV!
Hi,
warmest greetings to you!
Compared to some ‘rich’ Americans, you may have already set a wonderful model for rightsizing your ways of living, but forgive me for being cynical or somewhat ‘jealous’ to say that someone’s rightsizing could be your downsizing somewhere else and I think you might be able to do a lot more to ‘save the world’ in this COVID-19 pandemic. If you have continued spending a month or more in the mountains for the past 20 years, it’s not definitely upgrading anything or rightsizing anything for it’s just simply your routines or ways of saving for rewards. No offense.
‘Rightsizing’ should be dynamic instead of being static (20 years of routines). Everything’s changing for better or for worse; nothing is rightsized if nothing is changed.
However,I still feel happy for you guys. What a blessing! Enjoy a ‘COOL’ summer!
Hi Elli!
Thank you for raising some good questions and thoughts about rightsizing. While I realize that many Americans might appear “rich” in comparison to others around the world, wealth can be a very subjective thing regardless of where you live. To me that is one of the best aspects of “rightsizing.” While there will always be people who have far more, and those would have far less, rightsizing just suggests that we each find what works best for us, given our circumstances, and then live from that place forward. And I think we all, no matter where we live or our circumstances, do a sort of tradeoff for rewards. The way rightsizing works in my life is the process of continually making choices that lead to the most fulfilling, healthy, uplifting, and peace-filled life possible. But I am well aware that others can (and should) make other decisions and choices that better suit them in their circumstances.
I also agree that “rightsizing should be dynamic instead of static” but I interpret that slightly different than I think you might. I don’t believe that because one of our choices has been repeated for a number of years that it is necessarily routine or unchanged. Instead, it is the daily, weekly, monthly, yearly choices we all consciously intend that keeps rightsizing as a very dynamic process. That might look to be the same, or repetitive to others, but only I/we/you can tell for sure. For example, if a person wants to take care of their health, it is very wise to repeatedly make choices and decisions that support that good health. I brush my teeth twice a day and plan to continue to do it for the reminder of my life. Spending time in nature helps me in dozens of healthy ways. Rightsizing does not ask anyone to give up choices that support them. But it does ask us to be conscious of the tradeoffs of those choices. Consciousness is the most dynamic process of all.
The way I define rightsizing is that it will ALWAYS look different to other people. It doesn’t judge how others are doing it…that can be left for different discussions. What it does is repeatedly remind me to question my own choices and then consciously decide to either let them go or continue. However, by my very definition, everyone, including you my friend, has the freedom and opportunity to define it for yourself. Peace to you and I sincerely hope that your choices are leading you to a good summer as well. ~Kathy
Hi Gary! You recognize a bit of our personal conversations in this one didn’t you? Thanks for helping us to continue to get clear about what’s important to us. ~Kathy
Thank you both – great advice and very timely for us and, I suspect many people at this time. And, I really want to say your hair look lovely, Kathy.
Hi Mary! Thank you for letting us know you found our information helpful. AND…thanks for letting me know that you liked my hair….honestly it’s COVID-hair because I haven’t had a cut OR a color for 3 and a 1/2 months now. Thom told me it looked okay to him so I’m just letting it do it’s thing. I must confess it is MUCH easier, right? I’m hoping everyone is having decent-hair-days exactly as they are! ~Kathy
What a great post and vlog, Kathy! You and Thom indeed share wise words about rightsizing and making important lifestyle choices for the present and the future. You might know that we are in the process of rightsizing ourselves out of California and moving to Spokane, Washington. Hans retires in December and our dollars go much further there. We bought land and are having a 2000 SF manufactured home built and we will be closer to his brothers and their extended families. Your post was very timely this week! My Sunday Stills theme is “home” and I share a little about our new lifestyle and how rightsizing was right for us. I’m linking to this post which goes live on Sunday, 7am Pacific Time. You and Thom look like you are having a wonderful time in Idyllwild! Enjoy!
Hi Terri! So nice to hear that your plans for retiring and moving are coming along. I know you are a big fan of rightsizing and I look forward to seeing how that plays out in your move to Washington. I’ll bet you are super excited and I can’t wait to see your photos of it when you finally arrive. Thanks so much for your comment. ~Kathy
HI, Kathy and Thom – I greatly enjoyed this Vlog and agree that Rightsizing is more important now than ever. I also highly recommend others to read Rightsizing. There are excellent tips there. https://www.amazon.com/Rightsizing-SMART-Living-Reinventing-Retirement-ebook/dp/B01BCNAJOU/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=rightsizing+by+kathy+gottberg&qid=1591978115&sr=8-1
Hi Donna! Thank you so much. How sweet of you to put the link to my book here on your comment. While I’d love for everyone to read it that might find it helpful, as you know I don’t want to be a “pusher.” Marketing has never been one of my talents. I am glad you liked the vlog. ~Kathy
This was a good one! We know people as well who bought that time share, that RV, that second home and regret it, sold it or are very defensive in talking about it. It is almost a siren song for some retirees that you must do one of the above or of course buy the boat!
I am a believer to try out first before you buy and keep your options flexible.
My grandparents had a lake home that was great as a kid and close enough to where I grew up that my Dad could get to work from there the next day. I remember my grandmother saying it is just a trade in kitchen locations. I noticed she really wasn’t having a lot of fun because it was her house and she had 8 kids and 10 adults around to cook, tidy up, do laundry, dry clothes etc. They sold the lake house when I was about 8 and started wintering in warmer climates. I then on visiting my grandparents in Florida saw my grandmother happy and relaxed because she was not cooking, cleaning, because we all stayed in the same hotel but there was hotel staff to take care of us!
Hi Haralee! What a great example from your grandparents. And I’m not surprised that you picked up many of that “rightsized” moves for your own life. So much of rightsizing is common sense, but if we aren’t careful we just go along with the crowd and often discover that the choices made by the “crowd” are more about them than us. I think at our age it is time for us to finally figure out the life we really want to live. Thanks for sharing that with all of us. ~Kathy
Thom & Kathy;
I was nodding all the way through this. I LOVE this vlog! Thank you for your ALWAYS trustworthy and wise advice. We moved from 2000 sf to 1000 sf, and, while it was difficult to rightsize to that extent, now we actually USE every inch of space we have. No entire rooms go unused. And, the pool! We, too, are gone at least half of the 4 months the pool is usable. Now we live in a community, and the pool is solar powered, NOT on our dime, and usable year-round!
As always, I’m deeply grateful for your wisdom and friendship all these years. Enjoy your Idyllwild time! ??
Hi Jamie! So glad you liked it. And we consider it high praise because you are far more of an “expert” at video than we are. But they are basically fun to do…except for the differences in our directorial views of course!!! And yes, I’m so proud of you and Cindy for making such a rightsized choice where you are now. And we love and appreciate you both too! As for Idyllwild…maybe it’s time for another visit? Physically distanced of course! 🙂 ~Kathy