SMART Living 365

Ideas to create a more happy, peaceful and rewarding life--365!

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Self Esteem & Self Image—What’s The Difference & Why Does It Matter?

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Rightsized

Self–esteem isn’t asserting my right to do whatever I want whenever I want it—it is instead reminding me that I am okay no matter what experience may be occurring in my life at any time!

SMART Living 365.com

Connecting to Self Esteem

 

Like many other women I was raised to be nice, polite and want people to like me.  By the time I was old enough to realize that those “other people” didn’t always have my best interests at heart, it was too late.  That habit of seeing my self worth reflected by other people was deeply entrenched in how I thought and often how I behaved.  And although I’ve made lots of progress during the last 25+ years or so—the truth is I still often take the opinions of others far too personally, and I frequently care too much what others think of me—especially when it has to do with something I hold dear to heart.  That’s why when I recently came across a discussion by Deepak Chropra explaining the difference between self-esteem and self-image, I discovered there was a difference.   More importantly, knowing that difference matters quite a bit. [Read more…]

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Renting Vs Owning—And Other Thoughts On Impermanence

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Rightsized, Sustainable

“It is not impermanence that makes us suffer. What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

SMART Living 365.com

Who really owns the journey?

I’ve come to the opinion that our culture is obsessed with owning as opposed to renting.  Maybe because Thom and I have a background in real estate, or because we do our best to spend time away from our home every summer when it gets really hot—a reoccurring question we’re asked is, “So when are you going to buy a vacation place?”   To be clear, we’re not against owning property—we just prefer to rent our temporary homes instead.   But it’s easy to tell that many people don’t understand that we’re perfectly happy renting and have no desire to own regardless of how much we like the properties or enjoy the location.  And that got me thinking that perhaps our culture has gotten a bit too attached to owning things and forgotten the fundamental fact that everything in life is impermanent—and ultimately every thing is just a temporary right-to-use or leasehold estate. [Read more…]

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You Don’t Have To Be A Success

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful, Rightsized

SMART Living 365.comSince writing my post last week about curing my addiction to “more,” I’ve continued on by dwelling on the idea of success.  Gradually I’ve come to the conclusion that success is another one of those things that many of us waste much of our lives pursuing, without being fully aware of what it really means to us.  Like Lily Tomlin says, “The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.”  With that in mind, maybe it’s time to stop striving for success at anything—anything that is—except for being the best “me” each of us can be. [Read more…]

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The SMART Minimalist Tip #1—Uncovering A Boundless Mixture of Benefits

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful, Sustainable

“Living simply is not about living in poverty or self-inflicted deprivation. It’s about living an examined life where one has determined what is truly important and enough…and then just let go of all the rest.”   ~Duane Elgin

          SMART Living 365  While I don’t consider myself an expert or authority on minimalism or simple living, I do recognize the value of focusing on aspects of the practice.  That’s right, I consider minimalism or simple living to be practices that lead to a more happy, balanced, and meaningful life.  But because there are so many rewarding aspects to the practice, and so many juicy benefits to share—I’ve decided that a focus on each one as an individual “tip” would be helpful for myself—and perhaps you as well.  So to start with, I wanted to come up with best benefit of them all.  And I couldn’t do it!  The truth is that since I started practicing a more simple approach to life—the benefits keep showing up.  That’s when I decided that the primary SMART Minimalist tip is to let you know that simple living offers more benefits than you can imagine—and the only way to start experiencing them all is to just begin discovering them for yourself. [Read more…]

8 Comments

How Trade-Offs and Opportunity Costs Help To Create A Simple & Happy Life

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful, Rightsized

Kloe & Me on the day we brought her home from the shelter.

Kloe & Me on the day we brought her home from the shelter.

Like it or not, most of us are familiar with the idea that much of life is a trade-off. Like to live in the city? Then you’ll likely have to put up with noise and people. Hate exercising? Then you may gain weight and lose muscle mass. Want to live in the country? Then you might have to drive miles to find a Starbucks for your morning latte. But even if you are aware of the trade-offs you’ve made in your life on a regular basis, you may not have considered them in terms of the “opportunity costs” involved. What I’ve recently discovered is that when faced with trade-offs, calculating what are called “opportunity costs” is a great way to stay true to your values and focused on the benefits of a simple and happy life.
[Read more…]

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Midlife Minimalism—How Your Focus Changes & The Rewards Increase

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful, Rightsized, Sustainable, Thankful

“We get too soon old and too late smart.” ~Pennsylvania Dutch proverb

T & KI read many online blogs and a large portion of them are about minimalism and simple living. That’s wonderful because I believe there is richness to simple living that goes far beyond having less stuff. I also think that since I’ve been embracing it more and more, my life has become happier, less stressful and far more meaningful. But something I’ve noticed is that the vast majority of blogs about minimalism are written primarily by those in their twenties to thirties. And while I’m psyched to know that young adults are embracing the lifestyle, I also believe that maturity offers a perspective that should not be overlooked. In fact, it is often those who have lived through multiple choices and experiences that have the most to offer others. That’s why I thought a few perspectives from midlife should be included in any discussion about minimalism or simple living.
[Read more…]

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The Science of Friendship—And Can Hoarding Be A Good Thing?

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful, Sustainable, Thankful

“The only thing that really matters in life are your relationships to other people.” ~ George Vaillant

FriendsThose of us into simple living or minimalism knows that identifying and eliminating any thing superficial and nonessential in life is critical.  In fact, the television show “Hoarders” illustrates weekly the extreme burden that too much stuff can bring to a person’s life. But I’ve just come to realize that there is something that actually should be hoarded—and that “thing” is a friend.  Actually, an abundance of research now shows that finding, keeping and appreciating friends is good for our physical and mental health, good for our occupations, good for our creativity, will add years to our life, and enrich our experience in every way possible.  If we are willing to accept that as true, then understanding the science of friendship is one of the most important actions each of us can take to create a life of happiness, meaning and purpose during our time here on earth. [Read more…]

6 Comments

Rightsizing vs. Downsizing—Making A Positive Lifestyle Choice

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Meaningful, Rightsized, Sustainable

Can you guess which one gets 12 MPG and which gets 40+ MPG? It's all about rightsizing!

Can you guess which one gets 12 MPG and which gets 40+ MPG? It’s all about rightsizing!

Last month Thom came across an article in the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) with a headline that said,  “Everybody Says You Should Downsize. Everybody May Be Wrong.”   We both found that statement to be so incredulous that we had to reread it.  And we weren’t alone in our surprise.  Most of the other comments online also questioned many of the negative points offered in the article.  Clearly the author herself had not downsized and it was also obvious that her focus came from an outdated definition of the concept.  Naturally that got me thinking that maybe most of us approach the topic from the wrong direction to begin with.  Instead of thinking of it as “down” sizing—maybe we should consider it to be “right”-sizing.   And once we get the label right—it is much easier to consider the real benefits that come from living a lifestyle that is right-sized from the beginning. [Read more…]

9 Comments

2014–Reflections on Life, Simple Living and Happiness

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Aware, Meaningful

At the end of every year I have a habit of going back and reviewing things that worked well in my life in the last 365 days.  I think it’s useful to explore the actions, mindsets and understandings that have enhanced my well-being and happiness—and recognize those that didn’t, so they can be modified And because a big part of living SMART 365 is staying conscious, awake and aware—this practice might prove valuable for all of us.  I’ll start by sharing a few ideas that increased the quality of my life in 2012. [Read more…]

10 Comments

Beyond Suffering—What The Buddha Teaches About Tragedy

By Kathy Gottberg
Filed under: Meaningful, Rightsized

KG TogetherSomething about Buddhism always bugged me.   Of course, it wasn’t Buddhism itself, but what I heard.  What stood out and bugged me was essentially the statement made by the Buddha that, “Life is suffering.”  Not only did I not believe it, I thought the whole of Buddhism revolved around that negative idea.  Rather than look deeper, I resisted the thought as though I could control the Universe and keep suffering away from either myself, or those I love.  Flash forward about 30 years.  Now I not only understand a great deal more about Buddhism, but I also agree that suffering can and does happen every day to scores of people all around the world.  In fact, after a tragedy like what happened at the school in Connecticut or recently in Paris, how is it possible to think for a minute that suffering isn’t real?  Of course, the lesson taught by the Buddha doesn’t stop there.  Instead, the Buddha explained that freedom and peace lie in a space beyond suffering, and that liberation is available to us all. [Read more…]

4 Comments

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About

Kathy Gottberg is an author with seven published books and hundreds of articles covering dozens of topics in the last 35 years. Along with her books, her passion today is SMART Living 365 where she explores ideas and experiences that help to create a meaningful, sustainable, compassionate and rewarding life for herself and others. Beyond that, she lives with Thom, her best friend and soul mate in Tucson, AZ.

To contact Kathy: click here

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