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Hi Kathy, Malcolm and I are in the middle of a big life change right now and I’d like to think we got to this place because we recognize the difference between living and going through the motions. The easy/safe/comfortable thing to do would be to stay put and carry on, but we both recognize this life and this house doesn’t fit us anymore and it’s time for an adjustment.
Your discussion about how we spend our time resonates and I appreciate your thoughts about making excuses for not doing things. Dreams will never become a reality without putting ‘one foot in front of the other.’ The Malcolm Gladwell quote is one of my favorites, and I love the Tim McGraw song. It says everything about being present in the moment.
Hi Suzanne! Big life changes are usually exciting AND challenging! As you say, it is fairly easy to just stay put and carry on…but there comes a time when it is more painful to do that than change. Sounds like you are there. But at least you are staying conscious of that pull and talking it through. Big pluses in my opinion. Looking forward to hearing/reading about where your adventure leads you next. ~Kathy
Hi Kathy,
You and Thom had a really good discussion on a very important topic. I love you saying that most people don’t take the time to figure out what’s important to them and then wonder why it doesn’t work out. That is sad but true. Most of the time, it’s because of no follow through I think. And yes slowing down to “stop and smell the roses” is something that Shannon and I try to do.
I don’t know if you want to call them vision boards, probably more of a bucket list. But we have plans for the future that we revisit on a regular basis to see where we are at the stage. One I’ve mentioned before was we were supposed to go to Greece in September 2020. Well, that just got postponed. Now we’re re-planning and reimagining the trip for 2022.
Another thing we’ve taken on is our blog. That was a huge undertaking so I can understand learning Spanish. And I would agree 10,000 hours does make you more competent. We designed, built and continually add to our blog. That definitely keeps us busy – we’re not bored by any means LOL!
We are a huge fan of the Tim McGraw version of the song as well. This vlog really resonated for me as we used the same song in an earlier post of ours.
It was great hearing you and Thom. It gave me a better understanding into you and your relationship. You two actually remind me a lot of me and Shannon. And I mean that in a good way LOL. 🙂
Thanks for the thought and emotion provoking vlog this week! Loved it!
Hi Debbie! I’ve followed your blog long enough to know we would all get along famously if we ever get together. I do believe we share a lot in common. And when exactly do you plan to be in Greece? We will be in Europe for a lot of next summer and who knows? It would be great if our paths crossed over there.
And yes I’ve always thought of blogging as a wonderful way to keep us fully engaged in life AS WELL AS keeping our brains charging in the right way too. You have a great blog going so keep it up! ~Kathy
Feeling inspired by your and Thom’s calm approach to this idea. I love the sentiment but it generally makes me feel overly stimulated and desiring productivity when I think about “living each day to the fullest”. Loving my chance this summer to lean in to my “fullest life” being one of naps, slow living and just plain ordinary-ness.
Hey Mary! Knowing you somewhat I can see where the idea of slowing down and enjoying the moment can be a bit challenging to you nature to be so very productive and busy. it is a balance isn’t it. And what that means to one person very likely means something different to another type of personality. That’s why finding your “rightsized” approach is so important. But glad to hear you are able to appreciate it (at least this summer) and cherish the slow time with your family and nature. I’m guessing there all your other dreams will unfold perfectly in exactly the right time. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. ~Kathy
Mary, I think living each day to the fullest, is reflecting each evening as to whether I thoroughly enjoyed my day. It doesn’t matter if I lived my DOING or BEING. Sometimes naps/sitting on the couch/watching DVRd shows is exactly what my body and brain need. Other days are filled with activities. It’s all good!
It is a provocative subject. No regrets!
My story is on point. After my second diagnosis of breast cancer,19 years apart, the discussion was what treatments did I want to go through for what outcome. This is a common question in the world of cancer. If your prognosis is for 18-24 months, do you want to feel unwell with chemo to survive and reach that 24 month mark or do you do less treatment? Luckily my prognosis is on the 5 year horizon and I opted for treatment that were a rough10 months but hopefully I will have 4 years of good health. So with your vlog, yes everyday is important and I can say I don’t want to do something, see someone or participate with no quilt because I may never see this date again. No regrets!
Hi Haralee!
Thank you so much for sharing your very personal story about making choices and living with no regrets with all of us. As you say, when facing those sorts of decisions I am sure that it makes you think long and hard about how you want to live out the remainder of your time. But your example is also such an important reminder to me that we might all have such a decision lurking in the background of our lives and we would be wise to continue to make the choice for making the most of it. And like you say, “everyday is important and I can say I don’t want to do something, see someone or participate with no quilt because I may never see this date again. No regrets!” So glad you are still here to share those ideas with us! ~Kathy
Kathy, I love your vlog! It was so cool to actually hear what your voices sound like. 🙂
This post is so timely for me, and it’s made me think a lot (your posts usually do). Last week, I was visiting my favorite place in the woods, and I took a walk down my absolutely favorite trail. I sent my yoga teacher a picture of me there, and said I was so grateful to be in the happy place I always think of during savasana.
A week later, I took my first dose of doxycycline, for probable early stage Lyme disease, from a tick bite that I got on that walk. Since it is very early stage, I am expected to fully recover with no lingering issues, but it was definitely a scare that led me to take pause.
After having Covid back in March, I have been a lot bolder with my career (and have actually gotten a promotion recently), but this has really led me to rethink how I am spending my free time this summer. Before, I was exercising obsessively, and this has forced me to slow down and realize that I would like to focus on my writing. I quit Facebook, but mindless phone usage is still a problem.
Well once again, thank you for making me think! I am happy to be getting caught up on your posts!
Hi Bethany! Thanks for watching our vlog! And glad to hear you are enjoying nature as much as possible but thank goodness you caught the Lyme before it was a problem. A reminder for us all to be sure.
And how interesting to hear that you’ve been feeling bolder since having COVID. Was that because you wanted to make the most of whatever time left in your life? I’m guessing that but based upon your other comments, you also realize that it has to stay in balance. And if anything, it was/is a great excuse to focus on what really matters most to you….like your writing. Thanks as always for your comment and perspective. ~Kathy
Amen! This is a good reminder that we only live once and have to make it count. Thing is, most of us need a reminder like this once in a while. I think Mark and I have it figured out, though. We know what we want and achieve this on a daily basis. But, sometimes, there is adversity that is beyond your control. Like the next step in our current plan. Yet, I stick to the motto on my blog – “Don’t dream but do.” It fits right in with your discussion here.
Hi Liesbet! I tend to think Thom and I need to be reminded of this EVERY DAY hahaha…. And I agree, it sure appears that you and Mark have it figured out. While circumstances can (and will) step in to mess up our intentions, what we do with them and how we move forward does matter. I like to remember that while I would love to control the Universe, I don’t…and never will. I just hope to do my best each and every day. Thanks for your thoughts on this. ~Kathy
P.S. and yes, I’ve been on the lookout for and update. I know you are (or at least I think you are) are in Europe visiting family now but haven’t heard what the plan with South America is at this point. Just know your fans are waiting. 😉
Kathy – absolutely – the questions are two sides of the same coin. How are we using our time? I’ve posted my blog – and linked back to your posts. I don’t think I arrived at any answers but I’m still asking the question.
“What am I doing to keep my life purposeful, meaningful (and happy)? This is a great question, and a great topic. Thank you again for this great food for thought.
Hi Donna! Knowing you as a friend I think you already do a very good job at this. But just spending a little time in reflection is always good in my mind. Glad you liked it. ~Kathy
Love this! You put into words what I have been thinking about lately. Going to share this with my husband and have a discussion on an idea I have been churning…thank you
Will keep you posted on progress
Jamie
Hi Jamie! Glad you liked it. I do think that Thom and I having this discussion on a regular basis is something that will benefit us in the long run. I hope it works as well for you. ~Kathy
Loved you words of wisdom
Thanks Ann!
I’d like to know more. In your next blog or vlog post, at the bottom, could you link to the past posts you have written that relate to what you spoke about on the vlog today?
Thanks!
Hi Jackie! Thanks for listening to our vlog and I’m glad you liked it enough to ask for more. As far as specific posts, keep in mind you can always do a search for words or phrases on the front page of the blog and that can lead you in the right direction. After 300+ posts there are a lot to choose from. One that stand out for me is “Who needs all the time in the world if you’re not really living” https://smartliving365.com/who-needs-all-the-time-in-the-world-if-youre-not-really-living/ and “The power of review and reflection for designing a good life.” https://smartliving365.com/the-power-of-review-and-reflection-for-designing-a-good-life/ But there are a lot more in there if you want to dig around a bit. Thanks for asking. ~Kathy
Thanks for another great vlog! When I saw the title, I actually thought of one of my favorite songs from a few years back – by Kris Allen – Live Like We’re Dyin’: https://youtu.be/YbfeSImDntw
I’d never heard Tim McGraw’s version. Different but also good!
As I’ve mentioned before, I spent much of my life believing that I would die very young. That kind of thinking does drive one to make certain decisions – but as often as I come across the question – “What would you do differently today if you knew you’d die tomorrow?” – I have a different answer. Some answers are life-changing (joining a convent and then years later, faced with the same question – leaving the convent) and sometimes I think, “Nothing – I’m living a life I love – except I’d call my children to say goodbye.”
Recently, I’ve been actually asking myself the flipside of that question — if I’m going to be around for another 10, 20 or 30 years (I’m 57 so very plausible) – how do I want to spend it? And what do I want to do today that will help me enjoy those years. I’m struggling to find that answer… I’ve got a blog post in progress along those lines.
Anyway, thanks for another thought-provoking post.
Hi Janet! Thanks for sharing the link to that song. Like you, I’ve never heard of Kris Allen or heard his song…and yes it’s a good one.
And thanks for sharing your experience of living “live we’re dying.” And isn’t it good to know the only thing you would do differently than what you’re doing now should you know that tomorrow was the day that you’d say goodbye to those you love?
Of course you’re focus on the flip-side of that question is equally valid for us all. So if we are going to be around, what are we going to do with that time? In some ways I see them as a yin-yang equation where it is impossible to separate them and answering one of them is the answer to the other. But I’ll look for that blog post because I’d love to see what you come up with. ~Kathy